• 4 oz cream cheese, room temperature
• 1/2 c plain Greek yogurt
• 1 10 oz pkg frozen spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
• 2 Tbs radishes, finely chopped
• 2 Tbs red onion, finely chopped
• 2 Tbs red bell pepper, finely chopped
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1/4 tsp dried tarragon
• 1/4  tsp sea salt
• 1/4 tsp ground mustard
• 1/8 tsp freshly ground black pepper
• 1/8 tsp crushed red pepper flakes

Combine cream cheese and yogurt in a medium bowl.  With a hand held electric mixer, mix on low speed until smooth. Add remaining ingredients and enjoy!

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3. Food Love Sundays: Spinach and Swiss Chard au Gratin

Valentine’s Day is silly.  It does not matter whether you are single, married, or in some other kind of relationship. I’ve been married for 16 years now and we discovered a while back that Valentine ’s Day is just a money making commercial racket, and it probably irritates us as much as it irritates the single folks.  Cheap nasty overpriced chocolate, wilted red roses that cost a king’s ransom, and the worst: dumb heart-themed diamond jewelry designed for fickle-minded, materialistic,vapid women.

Why is everybody wondering what to do on this fabricated holiday?  You don’t even get the day off so what’s going to be different than any other day?  On the lists of things to do for bitter, sad, pathetic singles on V-day they say go out to dinner with your single friends.  Why?  So you can watch all the sickeningly syrupy sweet, smoochie-smoochie newly together “couples” showing off with a whole lot of orchestrated pda and sucking face in the restaurant?  My husband and I deliberately stay away from restaurants on V-day just to avoid all that.  Besides, everything is overpriced, substandard, and super-crowded.  Not my idea of romantic by far!

Another idiotic suggestion for the miserable singles is to take a long bubble bath.  Wha!? I don’t know about you, but that would make me want to burst into tears.  That seems like an extra lonely thing to do, which is why I would reserve the “Calgon, take me away” moments for when I’m overwhelmed by too many people and too much action.

This year Valentine’s Day falls on a Toozday.  Go to work.  Don’t get all emotional if you see a few of the women in your office getting a bouquet of a dozen raggedy roses thrown in the door by the harried courier making his or her record-setting rounds.  Why not just bring some of your favorite goodies, like cupcakes or other treats to share with everyone?  (I’m not saying this just so my coworkers can feed me) It will take some of the attention off of the few and bring some fun and festiveness to the whole office. Then after work go home.  It will be a day just like any other.

Now, if Valentines’ day fell on a weekend, then I’d say to plan a trip to Vegas with some friends and act a damn fool.  Because theoretically the strip bars and other shenanigans would be a free for all, because all the couples are busy sitting up in Red Lobster making googly-eyes at each other. Or just do anything else that is done in any place that’s not all romantical.  The sky’s the limit!

Whatever you choose to do or not do, don’t let this be a day for sitting around lamenting that you are not coupled up with somebody, just any ole’ warm body for the sake of getting some cliché trinkets and extra attention on just one day of the year.  Be who you are, do what you do, and forget about it.  Be happy with your fabulous self.  You are the same you you were on February 13^th, and February 15^th. For real.

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I’m gonna give the the bottom line right now.  One pound of fat = 3500 calories. You’ll need to create a 7000 calorie deficit to lose 2 pounds.  This translates to a 1000 calorie deficit per day over a 7 day period.  Point blank. It’s best to create this deficit with a combination of physical activity and eating lower calorie, higher nutrition foods.

All the little diet tricks and lies don’t mean a thing if you are not creating this deficit.  If you lose weight without creating this deficit, then you are just losing water.  This is why fad diets don’t work permanently.

Take the weekend to do your preparation and begin on Monday.  Or cheat! Begin on Sunday to give yourself an extra day to burn off those calories.  Ready?  Let’s go!

• Plan to eat in for all 7 days, just to make it easier, for now.
• Get rid of the soda, juice, and kool-aid (you should have done this already).
• Go grocery shopping.  Plan your meals so that there is a vegetable serving in at least 3 of your 4-6 daily meals.
• Look up your recipes and plan accordingly.  Need recipes?  Try here.  Or there.
• Cook food to take to work for lunch over the weekend if necessary.  Get the proper storage containers to make it easy.
• Buy some nuts to keep in your bag in case of hunger emergency.
• You can eat grains, just make them whole.  Brown rice, quinoa, whole oats, whole wheat pasta, and 100% whole grain breads are good.
• Drastically limit your sugar intake.
• Drink only water and unsweetened teas.
• Buy enough fruits to snack on 2-3 times per day.
• Now I’m not going to tell you what foods would NOT be a good idea to eat during this week so you’ll have to just use your common sense on this one.
• Scope out opportunities to move your body to burn those extra calories (so you can be less restrictive with the food). Walk more, drop in for a local dance class, play rope with your kids, etc., you get the picture.  Move by any means necessary!
• Don’t eat anything after ___ o’clock (3 hours before your bedtime)

Be ready to start on Monday (or Sunday for head starters).  Remember, this is just one week.  I have tons of useful ways to make this work longer term coming later.

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The question was, how do you set good boundaries after you’ve been hurt a time or two without coming off like you’re carrying a lot of baggage?

Your boundaries are actually not for other people, they are for you.  They are rules that you set for yourself that represent the way you would like to be treated.  Imagine how overwhelming it must be for a guy who has just met you to be bombarded with a laundry list of your boundaries.  Of course he’s going to feel like running in the opposite direction because he is under attack.  The purpose of your boundaries is to consciously establish what behaviors you will and will not accept from your partner in advance, so you would not be overwhelmed by the element of surprise if they are crossed, and it is your responsibility to act accordingly to ensure that your boundaries are respected.

Keep your boundaries to yourself, but honor them no matter what. Do not let the myths of too few eligible black men or lack of self esteem to make you waiver from your decision. You have the power to determine what you want in your life.  There is no need to justify, negotiate, or modify your boundaries.  You own them. It is also unnecessary to have a punishment or course of action ready and set for if the boundary is violated.  All you have to know is that you will not tolerate the behavior, end of story.  Once you acknowledge the power you have to establish and enforce your own boundaries, you effectively ensure that they will be respected by your partner.

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I’m not talking about the makeup and the team of pros who fix her up or Photoshop.  I’m talking about her voluptuous curvy figure I’ve always wished for.  I will NEVER look like that.  It still stings a little that I can’t have everything exactly and precisely the way I want it, but working through that…Wait!  I’m fabulous like Lisa:

That’s me in my 42nd birthday outfit. No team of beauty people, no pro photographer, and no edits.  Not bad.  Letting go of the silly fantasy of sexy round hips is the right thing for me to do.  Face it, Sofia can’t be fabulous like me either.  Stupid little voice: “now WHY would she wish for something like that”?  Me: Oh shut the hell up you little troll, I have plenty going for me, it just doesn’t happen to be a proportioned swimsuit figure that makes men fall to their knees. Maybe it’s my juicy juicy lips, or my brilliant mind. Besides, a few men have fallen to their knees because of me and no, I didn’t trip them!  I’m not going to go through the long list of things I have going for me because they only matter to me. What matters to you is the long list of things you have going for you.  Get it?

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You already know I don’t do new year’s resolutions and I don’t do diets.  You’ve heard me say it before, we trade in the darned noisy toy and jewelry advertisements all in our faces just for them to be traded out for ridiculous diet plan and exercise gadget commercials.  But by spring how many people are actually more fit than they were on January 2?  I don’t have hard statistics but you and I both know the number is probably less than 20.  20 people in America.

So!  I’m saving you from my whole bah humbug new year’s resolutions are so stupid presentation.

And I’m not preparing any rah!-rah! come on everybody and do this thing with me project.  Been there, failed terribly.

This revolution is about body image.  It’s quiet because it’s intimate, personal, not done in a class, and introspective in nature.  Why share it with you?  Because perhaps you’ll find it useful in your own journey. If not, that’s fine too.

It started with this note to my fashion stylist friend.

I did thousands of sit ups and crunches
Became the champion in ab boot camp classes (I even beat out the football players)
Lost 30 lbs.
Gained them back
Sucked it in
Had the fat sucked out with lipo (twice)
Stuffed it into a girdle, even the super support garments just bow out and make me look pregnant
Work out HARD 4 mornings a week

And no matter what, the rotund belly reigns supreme.

So time for a new attitude.

I remember the gap between Madonna’s teeth and how sexy I thought that was and even wanted one. Before Madonna, a gap in the front teeth was something that required immediate and urgent corrective action. It’s about how she carried it.

How about Jennifer Lopez’s butt?  I’m sure many in mainstream white society said, “Oh my Gaaah, look at her BUTT!”  However, she had a mindset advantage because that butt was good as gold in the black and hispanic communities. She lost tons of weight, but that butt didn’t go anywhere. And now, look who’s getting Brazilian Booty Lifts.  It’s all in the way she carried it.

What about Molly Ringwald’s flamin’ red hair?  Back in the day, red hair was teased relentlessly and considered to be hideous.  Now women dye their hair red so they can be fiery vixens.

Also, Michelle Obama’s hips come to mind.  I never (except for the dumbass right wing talk radio assholes) hear anybody (except ooops, wait now, after a quick internet search numerous jealous losers with low self esteem) bemoaning her hips. The majority praises her for always looking fabulous…

I never really had a problem with low self esteem.  I don’t care about celebrities’ shapes or magazine Photoshop tricks. My weight issues aren’t major.  But I’ve been fiending for an hourglass shape since I can remember.  I’m finally at the point where that’s enough.  It’s a wrap.  The struggle is OVER.  I’m going to wear this round belly well.  No empire waist tent dresses, no crazified color block outfits.  I’m finished with wearing clothing shaped like how I wish I were shaped and then feeling self conscious that people will mistake me for pregnant. I’ll continue with my current rigorous fitness routine, and expand my nutrilicious recipe repertoire  to drop a few pounds (because of the scale at the doctor’s office that let me know that things are a little over the top).  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the main thing that will change is my thinking.  This belly thing is much more in my head than anywhere else and it’s time for this revolution now.  Just in time for the new year.

I’m on a mission to change the world, one lifestyle at a time. If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it by pasting a link on your Facebook wall, liking it, or emailing it to a friend.  Thanks.

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Next, I’m not about to give you a list of dumbass cliche “holiday survival” tips that will make you feel like a mean ole’ winter troll at the party, but none of us wants to look like a fluffy town polar bear come springtime either. So check out my reasonable ideas to help you keep it together.

1. If you come to my gathering with a store-bought platter of carrots, celery, and some jank “veggie dip” your’re getting tossed out into the snow, head first.  Instead, why not just bring a bouquet of flowers and eat a light meal before the party and only enjoy little decadent dessert when you get there.
2. Do not attempt to make a nonfat, sugar-free, calorie-free b.s. version of favorite treats.  I am guilty of doing this in the past, but no more.  I only have these fabulous butter and sugar laden cookies once a year.  It’s not that serious.  It’s not worth compromising flavor and ingesting ubiquitous fake food chemicals that harm your body in the long run.
3. Don’t go crazy with overindulgence, only to make empty promises to yourself for the new year.  Indulge in little bits and pieces and don’t obsess about it.  Only partake in treats that you truly love, don’t nibble on so-so crap that is just a total waste of calories.  Continue to eat in your normal healthy way in all the days/hours around the actual holidays–Thanksgiving and Xmas, Solstace, or Kwanzaa, but don’t just let it all go all the days between Thanksgiving and New Year.
4. Be low key and don’t turn into one of those annoying diet bitches who feels the need to constantly brag about  the “good, bad, and ugly” of your holiday diet 24/7.  Just eat (or don’t eat) whatever and don’t go around making a big deal about it.  You will be surprised how much stress this will alleviate.  When someone approaches you with some food you don’t want to put into your body, just politely decline and say something like, “but it looks delicious”.  Don’t go into all that “I’m on a diet, trying to lose weight, watching my figure…blablabla…”
5. Do give some thought about what you want to eat, so that you’re not going to the buffet completely blind but try not to be too strict.  Deprivation leads to binging, almost inevitably.
6. Don’t go weighing yourself every single day and obsessing over the numbers.  You are so much more likely to throw in the towel because of the emotional impact of gaining a couple of pounds, which may just because you haven’t eliminated solid waste yet.  Good grief!  Again, keep up with your normal good eating habits through the holidays and if don’t have any normal good eating habits, the holidays are not the best time to start that.  However, the holidays are always a good time to just keep it all in perspective and don’t turn into a complete glutton.

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1 pound Swiss chard, washed and stemmed

1/2 pound spinach, washed and stemmed

2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil

1 medium onion, chopped

2 large garlic cloves, minced

House Tuscan Seafood Sprinkle to taste

3 large eggs

1/2 cup (2 ounces) grated gruyère cheese

1 cup cooked basmati brown rice

1. Bring a large pot of water to a boil while you clean the chard and spinach. Fill a bowl with ice water. Strip the leaves from the chard stalks but hold onto the stalks. Wash the leaves in several rinses of water. When the water comes to a boil, salt generously and add the chard leaves. Blanch for about two minutes, just until tender. Using a skimmer or slotted spoon, transfer immediately to the ice water. Blanch the spinach for 30 seconds, and transfer to the ice water. Let sit for a few minutes, then drain, squeeze out the water and chop medium-fine.  If this step is too much just use frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained and either saute the chard with the aromatics or skip it and double the spinach.

2. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Brush a 2-quart baking or gratin dish with olive oil.

3. Trim both ends off the chard stalks, then dice them. Heat 1 tablespoon of the oil in a large, heavy nonstick skillet over medium heat, and add the onion. Cook, stirring, until tender, about five minutes. Add the diced chard stalks and Tuscan Seafood Sprinkle. Cook, stirring often, for about five minutes until the vegetables are tender. Add the garlic and stir for a minute or so until fragrant. Add the chard and spinach. Stir together for 30 seconds to a minute, just to blend the mixture. Season with salt and pepper, and remove from the heat.

4. Beat the eggs in a bowl. Stir in the chard mixture, cheese and rice. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Transfer to the baking dish, and drizzle on the remaining oil.

5. Bake 40 minutes until firm and brown on the top. Remove from the heat, and cool for at least 10 minutes before serving. You can serve this warm, at room temperature or cold.

I’m on a mission to change the world, one lifestyle at a time. If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it by pasting a link on your Facebook wall, liking it, or emailing it to a friend.  Thanks.

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Friend 2: “Oh yeah? I’m on day 89 of the annual 100-day peanut butter and duct tape dress size 14 to zero cleanse and I’m in a great mood because I’m rid of all those deadly food toxins that had accumulated in my liver! Seriously, I’m not cranky.”

Friend 3:  “Umph, that’s nothing!  I’ve completely switched to the raw vegan organic sticks and igneous ancient European cave stones Hollywood celebrity lifestyle and I’m losing 46lbs every 8 days!”

Friend 4:  “Oh please.  I woke up at 2am and bench pressed my car, did 5,000 sit ups and 18,000 jumping jacks before dawn, all this before running a full marathon. I can eat whatever I want. Remember, muscle weighs more than fat!”

Friend 5 (me): “Whateva man, I guess that means you all won’t be interested in Sunday brunch at my house–spinach frittata, fresh broccoli salad, smoked salmon, berry and dark chocolate fondue, whole grain apple nut muffins and passionfruit mimosas—followed by some serious dance game shenanigans…”

Now I will not go into the issues with friends 1-4, because they are free to do whatever they please and if what they do makes them feel healthy and happy, more power to them!  But I’m tired of seeing the posts of friends 1,2,3,and 4 all over the internet, with all this kind of super-fitness banter that encourages some to engage in insane competition and others to be humiliated into permanent, depressing, lying on the sofa devouring cheez puffs and guzzling soda oblivion.

I’m here to tell you beauties, there is another way!   The secret formula goes like this:

Exercise – look closely at your schedule and get creative with your current movement options and make space for more.  Hate gyms? No problem.  Join a walking club, take rollerblade lessons, challenge your family to some Dance Dance Revolution, plant a garden, take golf lessons, go salsa dancing, play rope in the neighborhood, walk to open air markets, try yoga, or whatever.

Diet – That’s a noun, not a verb.  Make great effort to include as many glorious whole grains and deliciously fresh, colorful fruits and vegetables in your diet as possible every single day.  Seek out new and exciting recipes.  Even if you are not that skilled in the kitchen there is so much to explore, like salads.  I’m not talking about the obligatory goodie-two-shoes salad, I’m talking about sexy, exotic, and unusual combinations you will want to eat.  Decide for yourself how far you go with limiting foods that you know (like the back of your hand) aren’t nutritious.   Don’t lie, don’t apologize, don’t perpetrate a fraud.  Make up your mind and stick to it.

Mindset – This is where the challenge is and where most of us need diligent daily de-programming and support.  It is difficult because you will need to let go of everything that our culture preaches to you about diet and fitness, such as releasing that goal dress size that has been stuck in your head for your entire adult life.  Like putting the “no pain, no gain” fallacy to rest forever.  Or calling a truce in the war you’ve declared on your body.  Also, shifting the focus in every moment away from worry of what you look like to others.  Take pride in your appearance, wear flattering clothes, hair, and makeup if you like.  But once you step out, focus on sensuality–what you see, hear, feel, taste, and smell instead of constantly imagining the horror of protruding this and jiggling that.

Result – This is ongoing.  You will not wake up one day, having reached your “goal” and just go back to the old ways.  Whatever size and weight you end up with wholeheartedly putting efforts into designing your ideal lifestyle is healthy, happy, balanced, beautiful, YOU.

I’m on a mission to change the world, one lifestyle at a time. If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it by pasting a link on your Facebook wall, liking it, or emailing it to a friend.  Thanks.

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Now a little background about my body if you don’t already know me: I am an apple shape, as a result of genetics.  All the women on the maternal side of my family have some variation of this shape.   We have rounded midsections, broad backs, and heavier on top. If we were to completely let ourselves go we could turn into Jabba the Hutt.  My biggest complaint is that people ask me if I’m pregnant thanks to my disproportionately rotund tummy.   I generally wear size 10 and am average height 5’6″, which makes me slightly overweight but certainly not a plus size.  I suppose my breast size is average and my arms and legs are fairly fit looking.

Where am I going with all this?  Well, some of the “advice” I found online contained chillingly negative messages about my sweet, juicy apple shape. Truth be told, I would have preferred almost any other body type to the apple shape for myself.  Sure, I wish I were an hourglass, and have tried everything, including things I’m not particularly proud of, to change my shape.  Still, even though I didn’t particularly LIKE my shape, I didn’t HATE my whole body, geez!  There is a huge gap here. I generally avoid all of the advice that purports to hide flaws, camouflage, disguise, conceal, or otherwise standardize my shape.  I also skipped sites that assume that women with this shape are all obese and unattractive but I still managed to run across this nonsense:

My best friend loves apples and is really fond of them. But unfortunately due to health issues and her love for food has actually turned her into an apple shaped figure…Please don’t despair if you are shaped like an apple. It does not mean the end of the world, trust me you too can walk through life in style. Simply follow these top fashion tips for apple shaped women and you can easily hide your problematic areas.~random website.

WTH kind of thing is that to say?  Who thinks apples are the end of the world?  The whole world?  Really now? I bet the writer is really talking about herself and her miserably bad body image. What was she trying to accomplish?  Her advice wasn’t even that good.  Other sites advised the juicy apples to dress in monochromatic colors–for what?  Or dilute ourselves in some dark murky colors so as not to draw attention to our jacked up shape–that’s always desirable, right?

I just wanted to look well put together, balanced, and proportioned and be comfortable in some non-fussy clothes that don’t make me feel like a sausage in the microwave about to bust out of its casing when I sit down.  If I hated my figure then I wouldn’t bother to take the time and effort to dress it up nice.  And then I guess it would be the end of the world.

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Photo: Matthew Rolston

This photo is featured in O Magazine, of normal size supermodel, Katie Halchishick and founder of Healthy is the New Skinny, posing naked with surgeon’s markings indicating how much of her would need to be chopped off to give her the same proportions as the toy she’s holding. Whaaa?

The same way that greed is the root of evil, negative body image is the root of ugliness.  Have you ever witnessed the not-super-attractive woman walk into a room and light it up like a Xmas tree?  How does she do it?  She does it the same way that so many pretty women make themselves hideous by shlumping around being catty and self loathing.  It’s all in your mind’s image of yourself.

So, what if regardless of how you feel about dolls, celebrities, etc., you KNEW you were beautiful without question.  How would life be for you and the women around you? Now consider what is keeping you from this belief.  The corporate media?  Everybody else who’s influenced by the corporate media?

1. Stop comparing yourself to others.  This includes false corporate media images, how you were 20 years ago, or other women you know.  Just stop.  You are you and that’s that.
2. Refrain from criticizing other women. You may not even realize that sometimes we do this out of sheer habit, sometimes out of jealousy of something else that woman has, or even vicariously self-hating.
3. When you walk outside or into a room imagine that you are what you consider to be drop-dead gorgeous.  No, you may not believe it (yet) but just go with it and trust me, your confidence level will skyrocket.  Hold your head up, don’t hunch, make eye contact, and smile.
4. Release your diet obsession. Try not to allow guilt and regret ruin a fantastic food experience.  If you’ve had too much of a good thing forget about it.  Next time just consciously decide what and how much you want to put into your body beforehand.
5. I’m not gonna tell you to do something corny like stand in the mirror naked and admire your parts.  I will tell you to just try to be conscious of the negative dialogue with yourself when you see your reflection.  It would be ideal if you could begin to shut down that hurtful self talk and just be neutral.  If you don’t have anything nice to think about your parts, then don’t think about them.  Is it really necessary to impose a negative or positive judgement to every single thing?  Do you have that much time on your hands?
6. Look for beauty all around you.  Notice when other women look attractive and don’t be afraid to comment.  (No, it doesn’t make you gay, and if you are who cares?) Complimenting others has a strange but positive effect on how you feel about yourself.  Try it once a day and see what happens.

Feel free to try these suggestions and comment if you like.

UPDATE: I just accidentally discovered that today is Love Your Body Day!  Check out the blog carnival for more inspiration.

I’m on a mission to change the world, one lifestyle at a time. If you’ve enjoyed this post, please share it by pasting a link on your Facebook wall, liking it, or emailing it to a friend.  Thanks.

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(that’s my friend Lucy in the pic above–she does not cook but she’s always up in my kitchen, to my delight) to this:

So, now that the work is almost finished, I can focus on creating fresh, decadently  nutrilicious meals for the fam.  And, I also have space to move about and updated equipment to work with, so I will be hosting my own cooking videos from time to time.  Hmm, wondering what I should name the show…suggestions are welcome.  Thanks for your patience and stay tuned.

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Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper Wholesome Whole Grain Stroganoff

Ingredients:

Enriched Pasta (Whole Wheat Flour, Semolina Wheat, Durum Wheat, Vitamin D3, Niacin, Ferrous Sulfate, Thiamin Mononitrate, Riboflavin, Folic Acid), Corn Starch, Enriched Flour (Wheat Flour, Niacin, Iron, Thiamin Mononitrate, Riboflavin, Folic Acid), Whey, Salt, Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein (Corn, Soy, Wheat), Tomato (Dried), Calcium Carbonate, Artificial Color, Sugar, Lactic Acid, Citric Add, Maltodextrin, Partially Hydrogenated Soybean and/or Cottonseed Oil, Mono and Diglycerides, Calcium Lactate, Natural Flavor, Nonfat Milk, Onion Powder, Parsley (Dried), Mushroom Powder, Yeast Extract, Spice, Beef Stock, Mushrooms, Corn Syrup (Dried), Disodium Guanylate, Disodium Inosinate, Whey Protein Concentrate, Lactose, Garlic Powder, Soy Sauce (Soybeans, Wheat, Salt) (Dried), Egg.

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1. All this running outside but are you wearing sunblock?  Apply at least an spf 15 sunblock every single day, to prevent premature wrinkling, sunspots,  and skin cancer. Many of my super-fit peers have faces that make them old enough to by my mama.  And I’m no spring chicken. Btw, my mama is gorgeous and wrinkle-free!
2. Establish at least a basic skin care regimen: gentle cleansing, toner, exfoliation, moisture/sun protection.  No need for anything expensive or complicated, but if you are having any problems such as acne, wrinkling, sun damage, spots, etc., there are additional products that can help. (Affiliate link to Paula’s Choice, email me for products at 10% discount and avoid shipping costs)
3. Take care of your hair.  Stretching short hair into a dinky ponytail held together with clips may is damaging and unattractive.  Instead, wear a headband, bandanna, or let the hair go free while you exercise.  Don’t over wash, and be sure to use at least a light conditioner after each wash.  Some drier or more delicate curly or African American hair can actually be washed with conditioner.  Consult a qualified stylist for a purposeful hairstyle that you will be able to manage on your own.
4. Straighten up!  Some women try to make themselves appear to have a flatter tummy or tighter butt by hunching over with their shoulders up to their ears.  In reality they don’t look fitter, they just look like the Hunchback of Notre Dame.  Walking hunched over will make you look timid, frail, and insecure in your skin.  Proper posture looks like this:
5. Keep your teeth healthy and white by visiting a dentist regularly and if you find you have discoloration or stains, try an over the counter tooth whitener.

So, am I a terrible person for saying this? Maybe.  I’m ok with that.

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By sugar I am talking about all sweeteners, even natural honey, molasses, agave, high fructose corn syrup, fructose, sucrose, etc.  According to the World Health Organization, based on a diet of 2,000 daily calories, no more than 50 grams of sugar should be consumed per day.

Start slow and gradually cut the sugar intake to an acceptable level. Here are a few ways to reduce sugar in the diet with minimal drama and discomfort:

1. Replace sweetened processed items with half unsweetened items.  For example, mix half Honey Nut Cheerios with plain Cheerios; regular sweet yogurt with plain unsweetened yogurt;  sweet granola with super tasty but unsweetened Ezekiel 4:9 sprouted grain cereal.
2. Dilute juices with water.
3. Add a ripe banana to smoothies instead of sugar or honey.
4. Drink plain water, with slices of lemon, lime, cumquats, or cucumbers.
5. Pay attention to labels.  Sugar is hidden in sauces, condiments, spice mixes, breads, and processed meats.  Become familiar with how much a gram of sugar really is and establish a daily limit.
6. Treat yourself to fresh fruit and berries for dessert.
7. Cook more of your food from scratch, even sweets, and experiment with reducing the amount of sugar in recipes.  You’ll be surprised at how much you can reduce with no change in taste or texture.
8. Be wary of processed foods posing as healthy choices, such as energy bars, trail mixes, and diet shakes.

Related posts:

1. Nutritional Density: Let me break it on down (Part 1)
2. Nutritional Density: Let me break it on down (Part 2) Whole Grains
3. Nutritional Density: Let me break it on down (Part 3) Forget it, Just Eat Twinkies

“Contrary to popular belief, exercising doesn’t make you tired — it literally creates energy in your body. Your body rises to meet the challenge for more energy by becoming stronger,” says nutritionist Samantha Heller, MS, RD, a nutrition advisor for the Journey for Control diabetes program.

Heller says this happens on the cellular level, where the first stirrings of our natural energy production begin. “It all begins with tiny organs called mitochondria. Located in our cells, they work like tiny power plants to produce energy,” she says.

While some of that energy comes from your diet (one reason that eating too little can power down your metabolism), the number of mitochondria you have — and thus your ability to produce energy — is affected by your daily activity.

“For example, the more you exercise aerobically, the more mitochondria the body makes to produce more energy to meet your needs, which is one reason how — and why — regular cardiovascular exercise actually creates more available energy for your body,” says Heller.

So, even moderate exercise is a pretty secure investment in the body’s ability to more around more with ease and reduce fatigue in daily life.  Think about this the next time you feel like a lazy walrus, and I’ve been there, and get your butt up and move a little.  Cha-ching!

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1. Exercise Alone will not Make you Pretty, 5 Ways to Shift the Balance

What is Paula’s Choice?

Paula’s Choice is a no-frills, no-bull crap skin care line that I’ve been using for several years.  Paula’s Choice products successfully treat everything from acne to wrinkles, rosacea, sensitive skin, sun damage, dry skin, oily skin, and blackheads.  All of Paula’s Choice products are fragrance-free, colorant-free, and don’t contain any unnecessary or irritating ingredients.

The line was developed by Paula Begoun, aka The Cosmetics Cop, author of Don’t Go to the Cosmetics Counter Without Me, Blue Eyeshadow Should Be Illegal, The Original Beauty Bible, and Don’t Go Shopping for Hair-Care Products Without Me. Paula’s books have sold more than 2.5 million copies worldwide.  Her work as a nationally-recognized consumer expert for the cosmetics industry has led to repeat appearances on CNN, as well as programs such as Oprah, The Today Show, 20/20, Dateline NBC, The View, and Dr. Oz.

Paula’s Story: In Her Own Words

I created Paula’s Choice as a result of my own frustrations when I was a teenager trying to find products for my problem skin and then, later in life, for wrinkles and skin discolorations. My complexion was a mess and, like many of you, the skin-care products I used either didn’t help or made matters worse.  Paula’s Choice is a comprehensive collection of skin-care and select makeup products that meet my strict criterion for excellence based only on what published research shows is effective. My products are guaranteed to exceed your expectations.  I provide state-of-the-art formulas that are always fragrance-free, ecologically responsible, and never tested on animals.

Why I Use (and now peddle) Paula’s Choice Products

I have super sensitive moody skin that behaves as though I’m from northern European decent, even though I’m a caramel brown skinned person with dark eyes.  Everything burns my skin, even my own tears, which made it difficult to deal with my rosacea.  In her book, Don’t Go to the Cosmetics Counter Without Me, Paula analyzes each ingredient in every product she reviews for its efficacy and potential for irritating skin.  She was the first to admit and acknowledge that everything “natural” is not necessary good for sensitive skin.  Here is an example of  one of the in-depth reviews.  I love the skin care products and they are reasonably priced.  Since I don’t use her makeup line, (no good colors for black women) I refer to Paula’s Beautypedia Reviews and the Don’t Go to the Cosmetics Counter Without Me for her objective evaluations as a starting point for making my choices.

Email me today if you are interested in samples or a catalog of the Paula’s Choice products.

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1. Skin Detox: Foolish or Fabulous? By Paula Begoun
2. The Most Important Beauty Product
3. Exercise Alone will not Make you Pretty, 5 Ways to Shift the Balance

Bring a friend or two! We will cover bellydance basics, strength and conditioning, and improvisation jams.  You also work on accepting your beauty, tapping into your femininity, and loving your body.  All levels are welcome. If you have been thinking of taking bellydance classes with me, NOW is the time give it a try.

Classes will be on Tuesdays and Thursdays (don’t forget to double check) starting Thursday July 7th.

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I am a wellness consultant/coach. I help people how to lose weight and/or get healthy without strict diets or extreme or monotonous exercise. I have plenty of sound knowledge on the matter, and yet from time to time I forget to follow my own brilliant advice and when that happens, things go terribly awry, like this:

See, wha-haa-haapened-wuz…

Last winter (Around December 2009) I decided that I was a little too plump (photo on right is in January 2010) and that I should lose some weight.  I wanted to look good for an event in the summer. I ran outside in the snow. I was a maniac, not because I ran in the snow, but I just was.  I became obsessive.  Now of course by mid-June I was looking nice and slim and that was it.  I stopped everything.  I drank wine and ate cheez balls on the sofa.  I got addicted to cookies again.  Over the time when I was exercising I had been experiencing increasing knee pain.  I just thought it was the cold air giving me that rusty feeling and kept on going.  We had a blazin’ hot summer last year.  So the pain got worse and I didn’t run outside, didn’t join a gym, didn’t do yoga regularly, and all but stopped dancing.  So BAM! the weight all came back by October.  That’s insane because it was about 25 pounds!

Needless to say, I was experiencing much frustration and shame.  Shame not only because I let myself get this way, but because I was helping others to do what I was struggling to do myself.

When the weather began to break I tried to run again.  The pain was worse and progressively became unbearable.  By December 2010 I could barely walk, could go down steps without cringing in pain, and I thought I was going to be crippled for life.  At Thanksgiving I was cooking and dropped something on the floor.  I stooped down and could not get back up without rolling over like a bug.  Serious! I went to doctors who threatened surgery but sent me to physical therapy.  I have to give them a shout over at Physiotherapy Associates because they really took excellent care of me and helped to keep the pain under control and nursed me back to about 95% health.  I can run, do MMA fitness, dance, go up and down stairs, and enjoy life again with little pain, controlled by occasional ice.  So I’m having fun again and lost 15 pounds and about 15 more to go.

Stuff that I did that I knew better than doing:

1. Trying to lose weight for a certain date on the calendar.  That almost always ends up in relapse and even more weight gain.
2. Ignoring pain for too long.  Always listen to what your body is telling you.  I have a friend who ignored her running pain and had to have a hip replacement–and she’s not even 45 yet!
3. Not having a weight and wellness maintenance plan.  FAIL.  This has to be reasonably similar to the behaviors during the weight loss phase to be effective.

New stuff I learned from this experience:

1. Stopping doing what you love leads to misery.  I stopped dancing and let myself go. It’s time to get back to dancing.
2. Cross training is KEY.  The exercises I do in MMA fit keep the muscles surrounding my knees (quadracepts, hamstrings, hip flexors, abdominals, etc.) strong so that I can run, jump, dance and do whatever else I want without painful injury.
3. Things change.  What worked the last time doesn’t necessarily work now, so be prepared and willing to adapt.
4. Wellness can be a struggle for anyone.  I am not immune to weight gain and have to work at least as hard, and in many cases harder than my wellness coaching clients (due to genetics, being a foodie, etc.).

WTH does all this weight crap have to do with the tea in China?

All this leads to my totally selfish reason for offering free bellydance classes throughout the summer.  It’s way more fun to dance with lovely Goddesses of Beauty, like you.  Bellydance is one of the most fun things in the world.  Now that I’m back healthy again and can do it, I’m gonna DO IT!  Also, classes are free because of some remodeling work there will be times when we will not be able to dance in the studio so you’ll have to keep track of when there’ll be class and when there won’t.  But it’s FREE!

First free class is 6:30 on Thursday June 9.

I am located on Capitol Hill a short walking distance from Metrorail.  Contact me for the exact address because I don’t want any creeps peepin’ at us.  Tell your friends!  Oh, and thanks for reading my long story.

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